oh no this feeling

i’ve always loved roller coasters even though they terrified me.  i would always, without fail, freak out the second i’m strapped into my seat and my freak out would continue throughout the slow, slow ascension and by the time we reached the very top, i’d be in fucking tears because i knew what came next - the fall.

you know that fall, when your stomach feels like it’s somewhere in your chest, you feel like screaming but no sound comes out, everything inside you is not where it’s supposed to be.  your entire body is subjected to shivers, not just on your skin, but in every single organ, every single appendage.

i love the feeling and hate it at the same time.  whenever the ride is over, i want to get on it again, but once i go through the 2 hour line and am strapped into that seat once again, i freak the fuck out.

i was sitting in TG’s bed this morning, tracing his tattoos and touching him as he was putting his socks on.  that’s when the feeling hit me.  fucking full force.  not just a little tingle like before that goes away after a split second.  full. force.  i felt like i was on the top of that roller coaster.

i freaked out.

it’s never felt quite like this before.

May 22. 1 Notes.
#OMG this. People NEVER bitch at Willow for being a murderer. Allan Finch was accidental. Yes Faith reacted badly because Buffy made it seem like she was dumping it all on her and of course Faith had to look out for herself and things got way out of hand. And then when Richard offered her something she’d never had before she took it. Faith was just misunderstood and went down the wrong path that ended badly but she made up for it and she’s still paying for it and characters like Buffy still treat her like she’s this physco murderer when she really isn’t! Nobody ever brings up that Willow is a killer and wanted to end the world and everyone’s just fine and dandy with it. It pisses me off. Killing is killing. Okay yeah, I have a problem with Willow’s S7 arc, but I hate it when people try to put things in such a black and white perspective.  EVERYBODY accepts Willow, EVERYBODY shuns Faith.  Uh, no. People were not just so forgiving and okay with Willow being a murderer.  In “Same Time, Same Place,” when Buffy and Xander found a flayed corpse, Buffy’s first suspect was Willow.  Anya even wasn’t 100% behind Willow when she came back.  Willow let the dark magic take over her.  She killed someone out of grief, revenge, anger, and lost sight of her humanity in the dark magic that overcame her.  Not giving her any excuses here, but it wasn’t like lah-dee-dah *IM GONNA KILL YOU* lah-dee-dah.  Buffy and the rest of the Scooby gang are more “forgiving” of Willow than Faith because Willow had been their friend for a lot longer.  She’s their childhood friend and they’d been through a lot of shit together, so of course it’s more understanding that they’d try and forgive her.  (I can’t believe I’m defending Willow, especially since I pretty much loathe the character -_-) Faith, on the other hand, never really gives any of them a reason to just welcome her back with open arms.  After she accidentally kills the first guy, Buffy tries to help her and she turns it around on Buffy and even then, Buffy tries to get Angel to help her and says to Giles that she won’t give up on her.  It’s not like Buffy just turned her in and left her for the dogs.  Even Xander tried to tell Faith that he was on her side and she tried to strangle him.  And then the first thing she does when she wakes up from her coma is steal Buffy’s body, rape Buffy’s boyfriend, put a bunch of people in LA in the hospital, try to kill Angel, hit Cordy, and torture Wes.  Not exactly the paragon of virtue there.  And not everybody “shuns” her.  Are we forgetting how Angel was always there for Faith and willing to help her? It’s absolutely easy to understand why they’d forgive Willow and be weary of Faith.  I’m not saying that either one is better or worse than the other, but I’m sick of people making everything seem so black and white, like it should be so easy to forgive a character who is “just misunderstood.”  Buffy forgiving Willow and hating Faith is not just a question of who is a murderer and who isn’t.  People don’t work like that.  I love Faith.  She’s one of my favorite characters.  But it’s pretty obvious to me why people wouldn’t just accept her with open arms.

#OMG this. People NEVER bitch at Willow for being a murderer. Allan Finch was accidental. Yes Faith reacted badly because Buffy made it seem like she was dumping it all on her and of course Faith had to look out for herself and things got way out of hand. And then when Richard offered her something she’d never had before she took it. Faith was just misunderstood and went down the wrong path that ended badly but she made up for it and she’s still paying for it and characters like Buffy still treat her like she’s this physco murderer when she really isn’t! Nobody ever brings up that Willow is a killer and wanted to end the world and everyone’s just fine and dandy with it. It pisses me off. Killing is killing.

Okay yeah, I have a problem with Willow’s S7 arc, but I hate it when people try to put things in such a black and white perspective.  EVERYBODY accepts Willow, EVERYBODY shuns Faith.  Uh, no.

People were not just so forgiving and okay with Willow being a murderer.  In “Same Time, Same Place,” when Buffy and Xander found a flayed corpse, Buffy’s first suspect was Willow.  Anya even wasn’t 100% behind Willow when she came back.  Willow let the dark magic take over her.  She killed someone out of grief, revenge, anger, and lost sight of her humanity in the dark magic that overcame her.  Not giving her any excuses here, but it wasn’t like lah-dee-dah *IM GONNA KILL YOU* lah-dee-dah.  Buffy and the rest of the Scooby gang are more “forgiving” of Willow than Faith because Willow had been their friend for a lot longer.  She’s their childhood friend and they’d been through a lot of shit together, so of course it’s more understanding that they’d try and forgive her.  (I can’t believe I’m defending Willow, especially since I pretty much loathe the character -_-)

Faith, on the other hand, never really gives any of them a reason to just welcome her back with open arms.  After she accidentally kills the first guy, Buffy tries to help her and she turns it around on Buffy and even then, Buffy tries to get Angel to help her and says to Giles that she won’t give up on her.  It’s not like Buffy just turned her in and left her for the dogs.  Even Xander tried to tell Faith that he was on her side and she tried to strangle him.  And then the first thing she does when she wakes up from her coma is steal Buffy’s body, rape Buffy’s boyfriend, put a bunch of people in LA in the hospital, try to kill Angel, hit Cordy, and torture Wes.  Not exactly the paragon of virtue there.  And not everybody “shuns” her.  Are we forgetting how Angel was always there for Faith and willing to help her?

It’s absolutely easy to understand why they’d forgive Willow and be weary of Faith.  I’m not saying that either one is better or worse than the other, but I’m sick of people making everything seem so black and white, like it should be so easy to forgive a character who is “just misunderstood.”  Buffy forgiving Willow and hating Faith is not just a question of who is a murderer and who isn’t.  People don’t work like that.  I love Faith.  She’s one of my favorite characters.  But it’s pretty obvious to me why people wouldn’t just accept her with open arms.

(via thatgirlwiththebooks)

spikeluv84: cinemawesome: whatserekim: WHAT THE HELL? CAN THIS BE 1999 SO I CAN HAVE A LEIT FREAK OUT ABOUT THIS? throwing up rn  ewwwww ew ew ew ew EW. I get how the fandom can become a neat little world for people’s obsessions to fly crazy, but when it spills into real life and seeing a picture of two actors being cute disgusts you just because you don’t “ship it” in the ‘verse, I think you might have a little problem.

spikeluv84:

cinemawesome:

whatserekim:

WHAT THE HELL?

CAN THIS BE 1999 SO I CAN HAVE A LEIT FREAK OUT ABOUT THIS?

throwing up rn

 ewwwww ew ew ew ew EW.

I get how the fandom can become a neat little world for people’s obsessions to fly crazy, but when it spills into real life and seeing a picture of two actors being cute disgusts you just because you don’t “ship it” in the ‘verse, I think you might have a little problem.

(Source: aliceinsunnydale)

Jan 16. 21 Notes.

coworker rant

i love all of my coworkers to death, but it’s inevitable that once in a while, they’ll piss me off.  i have this one coworker that always insists that she be on bar and since i don’t really give a shit, i just let her do her thing.  the thing is she’s always getting stressed out and whenever she gets stressed out, she’ll start throwing shit around and it’s fucking annoying.

like i called out a “grande latte” once and she took out a tall cup and started marking it, but when i was like “hey, it’s a grande latte,” instead of just putting the tall cup back so it can be reused or just putting it in the garbage like a normal human being, she starts muttering under her breath and throws the thing so hard in the general vicinity of the trash can that it hits another counter and bounces all over the place.  and then this leads to more cursing as she’s fetching the cup and throwing it out.

i can usually handle this when i’m in a good mood, but lately, i’ve been really tired and i don’t think i can deal with her today.

Jan 08. 0 Notes.

angel 1x19 sanctuary

Buffy is pissing me off.  I love her, I do.  But whenever she appears in AtS, I just want her to take her self-righteous ass back to Sunnydale.  And apparently Angel does too.

Jan 01. 0 Notes.